My friend Marcus grew up with Chihuahuas. His wife grew up with a Saint Bernard. When they finally got a dog together, the negotiation lasted three weeks and ended with a Great Dane named Gerald who occupies more bed than either of them and has never once acknowledged this as a problem. Marcus, formerly a … Read more
My sister’s family debated getting a dog for almost four months. Her husband wanted something intimidating. Her seven-year-old wanted something fluffy. Her five-year-old wanted whatever the family next door had. They landed on a Beagle named Pretzel, who has since destroyed two remote controls, one passport, and a full stick of butter he pulled off … Read more
Picture two dog owners at your local park. One is white-knuckling a leash attached to a 130-pound Mastiff who’s spotted a squirrel. The other is carrying a shivering five-pound Chihuahua because the grass is wet. Now look over by the trail entrance — there’s a family jogging with their Aussie, the dog matching every stride, … Read more
Last summer, my neighbor’s kid stopped a complete stranger on our street to ask if he could pet her dog. The dog was a Samoyed — white, massive, moving like a small weather system. The woman said yes. The kid sat down on the sidewalk and didn’t move for ten minutes. His mom had to … Read more
My neighbor James spent fourteen months on a breeder’s waitlist for a Samoyed puppy. When the call finally came, the price was $5,500. He wired the money the same afternoon, drove six hours to pick up the dog, and posted approximately forty photos to Instagram before he got home. No one who knows James was … Read more
When my uncle brought home a Rottweiler named Biscuit, half the family staged what I can only describe as an informal intervention. He listened politely, enrolled Biscuit in obedience classes before the dog had been home a week, and proceeded to raise one of the most even-tempered animals I’ve ever met. The neighbors never quite … Read more
A friend of mine spent the better part of three months researching dog breeds before landing on a Shiba Inu. She had a spreadsheet. Color-coded. Twelve breeds ranked by apartment suitability, grooming demands, energy level, and what she called “vibes.” The Shiba won on vibes. About six months in, she described owning one as “adopting … Read more
My aunt Helen is 74, lives alone in a one-bedroom apartment, and has owned small dog breeds her entire adult life. Her current dog is a Miniature Poodle named Coco — nine pounds, her own wardrobe, veteran of more restaurant patios than most people I know. Helen has never once wished Coco were bigger. That’s … Read more
My neighbor Tom has a Bloodhound named Clive. Last spring, Clive tracked a dropped granola bar across three backyards, through two fence gaps, and under a garden shed. Tom found him forty-five minutes later in a compost pile, nose-deep, with the expression of a dog who had done exactly what he was born to do. … Read more
My coworker Rachel had wanted a dog for years. She also had the kind of dog allergy that announced itself within minutes — watery eyes, sneezing, the whole thing. She finally got a Miniature Poodle named Otto, ran an air purifier, and vacuumed more than she used to. Two years in, she’s mostly fine. She’s … Read more